This is the third part of a three-week detour away from the Gospel of John.
In John 5:16-29 we saw how the religious leaders placed too much value on their traditions and ended up opposing God.
We saw how the centrality of Jesus Christ is far more important than “the way things have always been done.”
Last week we looked at 1 Corinthians 9:19-23 where Paul describes his willingness to adopt his society’s methods of communicating and interacting as long as they did not cause him to disobey God’s Word.
He steps outside his comfort zone and does things differently than he is used to if it enables him to communicate the Gospel more effectively.
I asked you to pray about what that might look like in our own neighborhood.
Are you willing…
…to invite someone you know to come with you to a service or event?
…to host, lead, or participate in a community group?
…to play an instrument during the worship service? (starting with special music)
…to be involved in children and youth ministry? Or at least make our church a welcoming place for children and young people (today’s focus)
As I said last week, God is very much at work in our ministries to children and teens.
On Wednesday night we had 22 children and 19 teens here.
After some pretty chaotic beginnings and a lot of patient work, a core group is developing of young people interested in learning and applying God’s Word
On the last Sunday of this month several young ladies who have recently trusted Jesus as their savior are going to be baptized.
If we want to keep in step with what God is doing in our neighborhood and in our church, this is one of the places we need to be focusing.
But this is an area where the harvest is plentiful, and the workers are few.
If one regular volunteer is sick and can’t make it, everything is thrown off because things are running so close to the bare minimum.
What I want to look at today is what the Bible says about children and young people.
I preached a version of this sermon just a couple months after I first started here.
Given how God is at work, it seems like a good time to update and remind us of it.
We are going to be primarily in Mark 9 & 10
The Indignation of Jesus
(10:13-14) Children must not be hindered
(13a) The incident starts with parents bringing their children to Jesus to be blessed.
Blessing: a special request for God’s favor on that person.
It was fairly common to ask for blessings from respected religious people.
These are probably fairly young children (as they are being carried by their parents).
(13b) The twelve disciples decide that Jesus shouldn’t be bothered with this. They scold the parents and try to get rid of them.
Children were often seen as the least important members of society: loved by parents but offering few useful contributions to society until they grew up.
I’m not sure exactly what the disciples’ reasoning was, but I have heard Christians offer these reasons why ministry to children & teens is unimportant or pointless:
(especially children & teens who didn’t grow up in the church and/or whose parents do not attend church)
They don’t contribute anything to the church (offering, volunteer help…).
It takes a lot of time and resources away from more important ministries (i.e. ones that benefit adults).
They’re just going to leave eventually (due to the pull of the world or just growing up and moving elsewhere).
The most common one: Kids these days don’t know how to show respect – they’re fidgety, disruptive, noisy, and messy in God’s house.
“If the naughty ones don’t change pretty quickly, we need to ban them otherwise it’s like wasting time watering a dead plant.”
“They’re not the kind of people we want in our church.”
(14a) This attitude that finds reasons to push away children and hinder their coming to Jesus makes Jesus indignant/angry.
Indignation: the visceral response that says, “That is so wrong!” / the emotion that makes you want to say, “How dare you?!”
It is not the response you want from God the Son because his anger is always justified and directed against what is truly sinful & offensive to God.
Because he is gracious and loving, Jesus uses this as a teaching moment for his disciples (as we will see in just a minute).
One reason Jesus’ responds so strongly is that the disciples should know better; not too long before this, Jesus had told them how children should be treated.
(9:35-37) Children must be welcomed
Being welcoming toward children in Jesus’ name (for his sake and as if he were doing it) is the same as being welcoming/loving toward God the Father and Jesus himself.
Context: humility and willing service toward all people (including children) are true indications of spiritual maturity and God’s pleasure.
Picture Jesus sitting there, hugging a child as he tells his disciples this.
The next time a child is trying your patience, picture Jesus standing behind them with his arms around them.
Realize that though he is not visibly present, Jesus is with us and tells us that how we treat children says a lot about our relationship with him.
We must be welcoming and loving toward children in the name of Jesus (as if he were doing it) because that is a way of showing our love for God.
The command to love God with all that we are and the command to love our neighbors (including children) as ourselves are inextricably linked.
Ministry to children is not done for what we can get out of it.
They are not tools to reach the rest of the family.
They are not being groomed to ensure that they are future financial supporters and volunteers of this church.
They are welcomed, loved, served, and taught because they are human beings made in the image of God and loved with his perfect love.
…whose sins were paid for on the cross so when they trust in Jesus they receive forgiveness of sins, eternal life, a new nature, & the Holy Spirit…
…even the “naughty ones.”
Doing good to others without expectation of benefitting in return is an important part of being like our heavenly Father. Jesus makes this point repeatedly.
Luke 6:32-35 – He says its true even of how we treat our enemies.
Luke 14:13-14 – He says it is true of how we treat the poor and disabled.
How we treat people regarded by others as annoying or unimportant is a measure of our relationship with God.
(9:42) Children must not be caused to stumble
Causing a child, young person, or other person regarded as less important to stumble in their relationship with Jesus is a big deal.
Context: the seriousness of sin as an offense against God that is worthy of hell.
Meaning of cause to stumble:
It is the word from which we derive our words scandal & scandalize (not the exact same meaning, but in the same ballpark).
It can include being the cause of someone falling into sin, rejecting the faith, or accepting a false teaching.
It can include causing someone to be shocked or dismayed (the kind of behavior that sends them away scared or crying).
Basically: damaging their walk with the Lord through treating them poorly or setting a bad example.
The consequences can be devastating
A tragic example from a church I attended (names changed, all other details true):
Victor, a 12-year-old boy adopted from Eastern Europe, attended church for the first time in months and seemed pleased to be there. Between services he was playing with the Pastor’s oldest son, Levi, and they got a little wild.
Maude, a longtime Sunday school teacher, was vastly offended at the disrespect being shown the church building and chewed Victor out royally (ignoring Levi).
We never saw Victor at church again, and within a week or two he had committed suicide.
Maybe it would have happened anyway, but in his final days he experienced harshness rather than grace as he tried to reconnect with his church family.
This is an extreme example, but a reminder that you do not know what a person is facing in their life outside of church…how much they might be in desperate need of gentleness, love, and grace.
Jesus uses a graphic illustration of the seriousness of causing a believing child to stumble: You would be better off having a heavy millstone hung around your neck and being thrown into the sea.
Millstones are heavy stones used to grind grain, press olives, etc.
They came in various sizes.
Jesus refers to one that is big enough to be “donkey powered.”
Basically, you would be better off dying in an appalling manner than to hinder a child’s walk with Jesus.
How we treat children and act in front of them (especially at church) affects their perception of God’s character, his love for them, and his will for their lives.
Even when there is the need to be firm with someone who is disruptive, that firmness must be expressed patiently, gently, and humbly
Correction must be motivated by love, not frustration or anger (Galatians 6:1, 1 Thessalonians 5:14).
I see nothing in these verses that says “unless they’re younger than you… then you can let ‘em have it!…no need to practice the fruit of the Spirit like kindness, gentleness, patience and self-control with them…”
Examples of potentially damaging behavior that does not communicate loving care:
A harsh/angry tone of voice (Proverbs 15:1 – A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.)
Extended scolding/lecturing (they are either going to tune you out or end up completely heartbroken depending on their personality).
Constant nitpicking over minor issues / unrealistic behavioral expectations (e.g. most children will not sit perfectly still and quiet for 30 minutes).
Refusal to consider special circumstances (sometimes you should make accommodations in non-moral rules for shyness, special needs, etc.).
Public humiliation for bad behavior (or just putting a shy child on the spot).
Within passages about parents raising godly obedient children, are warnings to not do so in a way that causes unnecessary anger, resentment, and discouragement.
Cf. Colossians 3:21 & Ephesians 4:6
These warnings should be heeded by anyone instructing children as we do not want to be deserving of a fate worse than drowning with a millstone.
It can be a test of patience to work with people who are not good at showing respect and following rules, but that does not entitle us to throw up our hands and write them off.
Passages about grace and forgiveness for those who offend repeatedly are no less applicable to children and teens than they are to anyone else (Matthew 18:21-22).
In the parable that follows (18:23-35), Jesus really drives this home.
Holding a grudge against a child or teen who offended you is just a sinful as holding a grudge against anyone else (Matthew 6:14-15).
It’s probably worse given that you are supposed to be the spiritually mature one in the relationship.
It is certainly offensive to God who highly values children, which brings us back to Mark 10 as Jesus corrects and teaches his disciples.
The Faith of a Child
(10:14-15) Children are examples of saving faith
Jesus tells his disciples that children are the perfect example of those who are qualified to enter the glorious eternal kingdom of God.
Not that they are innocent, sweet, unselfish, etc. (because sometimes they are, and sometimes they aren’t…ever heard of the terrible twos?)
Rather, their very nature and position in society is that they are helpless.
They must receive whatever they are given
If they have good parents, they receive daily necessities from their parents because they need them, not because they have earned them.
The very reason that the disciples probably wanted to send them away was the characteristic that God valued most: complete dependence.
We must come to God with this attitude of childlike dependence.
We must trust him to give us forgiveness and new life, not because we deserve it, but because he is good, loving, and gracious and delights to bless us.
He has already done everything needed and freely gives us salvation when we come to him in faith.
(10:16) Children are deeply loved by God
The passage ends with Jesus taking the children in his arms and pronouncing God’s blessing/favor upon them.
In Matthew’s account of these teachings, Jesus emphasizes God’s special love for “little ones.”
Matthew 18:10 – God cares for them so much that angels who stand in his very presence are assigned to them (probably referring to guardian angels).
Matthew 18:14 – God desires to save all little ones.
Do we reflect that same love?
Do we allow God to work through us in accomplishing his will?
Or are we arrogant enough to decide “today’s young people are just too disrespectful for me to put forth the effort. I’d rather sit back and complain about them than help them come to Jesus and grow in their faith.
The Inclusion of Young People
Young people are needed in the body of Christ
The most popular theme verse for church youth groups is probably 1 Timothy 4:12…
…and with good reason: it is a reminder that believers of any age can and should be involved in the life of the church as they grow in their faith.
While this is originally directed to young Pastor Timothy and can serve as encouragement to all young Believers, it should also be a reminder to older people in the church not to despise, disparage, or discourage younger believers.
No matter their age, every person who has trusted in Christ as Savior has a new nature and is empowered by the same indwelling Holy Spirit of God.
“There is no Junior Holy Spirit” (Gareth from Rend Collective)
The body needs all of its Spirit-empowered parts to function as it should.
We cannot expect younger people (speaking in terms of children up through younger adults) to want to be part of a church that makes them feel like second-class citizens.
Some ways to have a welcoming church atmosphere for younger people
I’m not saying that we are utterly failing at all of these, but prayerfully consider them and how you can contribute to doing even better as we keep in step with what God is doing.
We should have infant and young childcare (aka nursery) available during regular ministries (Sunday/Wednesday).
No parent of young children wants to come to church and end up watching their own child in the nursery…they can do that at home.
A parent of littles who visits for the first time and discovers that nursery is unavailable or being hastily thrown together is much less likely to return…
It does not inspire confidence that we care about young families.
At this stage, some weeks that will mean the nursery is all ready to go and no one needs it, but discouragement should not cause us to shoot ourselves in the foot by letting the ministry wither.
If you can help with nursery on a rotating basis please consider doing so.
For Sunday: Hannah Rogers / for Wednesdays: Karen Mitchell.
Let them know how many times per month you can help (even if it’s just one!)…many hands make light work
It is an excellent way to minister to parents of little ones and the little ones (and get to know both more personally).
Closely related, we need more volunteers for youth ministries (children & teens / Sundays & Wednesdays).
We currently have just barely enough people to run these
If one person is sick, it requires major shuffling and if two we have to consider cancelling.
We have amazing volunteers, but the laborers are few and burnout is real.
Consider volunteering as a helper, again, even if it’s on an every-other-week or once-per-month basis.
Sometimes it will require patience, swallowing your pride, choosing words carefully, and depending on God’s help…
…but I’m pretty sure those are all good things to practice if you want to grow in your faith, not things avoid because they are hard & uncomfortable.
For Sunday mornings: Diane Stoner & Jerianne Strauchman / For Wed. night teens: Pastor Been / Wed nigh children: Karen Mitchell
We must avoid complain and gossip about “young people these days.”
Complaining and gossiping of any sort are sin.
Young people hear what is being said…would you want to be part of a group that continually broad-brushed you in negative terms and spoke with derision about the things you liked and enjoyed?
You might not understand things like fidget spinners, crocks, Roblox, water bottles, using a Bible ap on your phone or preferring text to voice, but that doesn’t mean you need to criticize and mock them.
A constantly critical spirit toward those younger than yourself will show itself in how you treat them even if they don’t hear your complaining and derision…the mouth speaks what the heart is full of (Luke 6:45)
A good check against this: try regularly praying for them (a project related to this coming up in the next few weeks).
We must avoid nitpicking and using harsh words to children and teens.
You don’t need to reprove or correct every little wiggle, strange fashion choice, distracted moment, or exuberant expression.
When correction is required, it needs to be done calmly, gently, and patiently.
We must include younger people in ministries of the church (beyond the ones designed specifically for them).
That includes talking to children and teens like they’re human beings, not just little nuisances to be controlled.
Pro tip (and this doesn’t apply just to children and teens): the ones who are more shy or introverted probably do not want the conversation to take the form of a lot of personal questions.
A thanks, compliment, or general “good morning [name], glad you’re here!” is going to be good for some people.
That includes making opportunities for them to work alongside older people in the church in projects or ministries (e.g. ushering).
That includes allowing more mature young people (e.g. younger adults) to take part in planning and leading ministries without slapping down every new-sounding idea.
Remember the centrality of Jesus Christ and the mission he has given us is far more important than keeping things comfortably “how they’ve always been done.”
Let’s be the body of Christ that grows together in maturity, doing the work of the ministry together (Ephesians 4:15-16).
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